a film/performance by Anto Astudillo

Watch the 7min short clip of the full performance

In "Render my body" I explore what it means to inhabit a queer body in today's world.

The project consists of different layers of visualization: a 16mm film/performance, the projection of this film onto my body, a psychophysical choreography and the rendering of a non-binary avatar by The Glad Scientist, all put together in a roughly 20min live performance.

Render my body - Avatar_110.jpg

For the creation of the avatar I asked The Glad Scientist to help me design a character that represents my queer body in transition. The avatar is shaped after my current body structure, pushing some physical attributes to blur the boundaries of cis-het notions of the body while it also resembles a humanoid figure that once appeared in a dream I had many years ago when I first came to the U.S. In this dream I was surrounded by a group of blue&purple genderless beings that were taking me into the ocean, in a harbor off the coast of New York City. I could see myself abandoning my old life inland and becoming one of them.

The avatar is meant to continue their transition along with mine IRL being informed by my gender identity as trans non-binary, dream visions and current events changing the restrictions in our current society of survival (in reference to Byung-Chul Han's article)

This performance was first shown at Culture Lab LIC

September 11, 9:30pm

Play the video in full screen to follow along with the performance (to be played at the performance site)

Render my body - Avatar_10_edited.jpg